Today, we met the surgeon our care coordinator has chosen for me: Dr. Madorin. She is petite, nice, understanding, patient, and straight with the facts. She felt The Lump and agreed it might be swollen due to the biopsy, which is probably why it hurts.
She confirmed everything that has been told to us to this point. Based on the information we have, lumpectomy is still the best option. She said that MRIs are very good at detecting lymph node involvement, and none was detected.
I told her I was worried it was growing fast. She agreed it could have grown a little larger in the past month, but she thought it was more because it was inflamed from the biopsy.
We talked about bilateral mastectomy and referral to a plastic surgeon so I can discuss my options and questions with him/her about reconstruction or breast lift with the lumpectomy to make both sides match.
She said chemo would shrink The Lump, and she has even seen them shrink to nothing. But she warned that even if that happens, the surrounding tissue would still need to be removed to ensure clean margins. She said I may even notice a change after my first cycle.
We talked about lymph node involvement. I was under the impression that if by the time surgery happened in 5 months or so, my lymph nodes did show signs of cancer, I would have to have a mastectomy. Dr. Madorin said no, she would make a separate incision in my armpit area and take the lymph nodes from there. Two scars, but I’d rather have that than a mastectomy if I can avoid it.
We talked about surgery and how I felt a mastectomy or bilateral mastectomy without mitigating factors suggesting these steps should be avoided. Why would someone want to put themselves through that much surgery if it really is not necessary? She agreed, and she told us that studies show there is no increase in recurrence with a lumpectomy vs. mastectomy.
If genetic testing results come back negative, I am to call her to schedule a follow-up 6 weeks prior to the last chemo treatment so we can start the scheduling process for surgery and reconstruction/lift with the plastic surgeon.
If genetic testing results come back positive, I am to call her to schedule follow-up 8 weeks before the last chemo treatment so we can start that scheduling process for surgery and reconstruction if I decide to go that route.
Still so many variables. Taking my cleansing breaths and reminding myself, one day at a time. Slowly, that grey dragon of anxiety and fear settles and fades. It’s still there, but not as strong. It doesn’t try to choke me as often, stop my heart, squeeze my innards.
Life is on hold.