For two nights in a row now I have dreamt of family. Thursday night I had vignettes of various scenes of my family and extended family celebrating various occasions. It started with all my family, and when I say all I mean ALL, celebrating my younger cousin and his new bride. It was around a first home search/purchase or something like that. We ended up with dinner at a restaurant. We were all in a private room in the back. All of us sitting around a huge table, talking, sharing, and laughing. Having a wonderful time, and I realized that my now deceased maternal grandparents were watching over us, happy, with a sense of “Look what we have created” accomplishment. It brought me a feeling of ease knowing my deceased grandparents were watching over us.
I went through several other scenes with family, bonding, loving, sharing. I don’t remember much, just the wonderful feeling of togetherness. The last vignette was with my sister/cousin, her boys, husband and mom (my aunt). My uncle passed away years ago from malignant melanoma. My uncle was a republican. One of Deda’s sons was extolling to us the virtues of being a republican – fiscal responsibility, 2nd amendment rights, smaller government… and so on. Then he told us that all men are republicans and all women are democrats and that is why men and women do not understand each other. He then announced that when he grows up he is going to be a Democrat! We all clearly heard my deceased uncle say at that point “over my dead body!” And then he (my uncle) laughed. We laughed as well. This is when I woke up giggling. Nice way to wake up!
Last night I specifically dreamt of only my father’s family. I had vignettes of family talking, drinking and laughing all over various areas of the San Francisco Bay Area. I ended at my great grandparents house, but not one I remember. This house was at the top of a hill that I could not tell you where in The City, but it was a typical turn of the century single family home – tall and skinny, one abutted to another, the whole length of the street. The front doors on the second level with stairs up from street level. Only the stairs up to my great grandparents home we’re narrow and steep with a very low wrought iron railing. My brother called me while I was climbing those stairs, joking and teasing me all the way up. I woke as my great aunt was taking me in to see my great grandparents.
Am I dreaming of my family past and present because I find family a balm to my soul. My family brings me peace, love, compassion, and harmony. I feel safe and more whole when I am surrounded by my family, amid the chaos, laughter, tears, and yelling, I will gladly sit and watch all this happen around me as it fills my heart and soul. But why my past family? Why the family that has already passed? I know some of my antecedents watch over me, help guide me, keep me safe. Is this why they are in my dreams right now? Helping me to find my joy again? Or are they here to help me accept something else in my life? I’m not sure, but having the dreams the past two nights has been an easing of my stress, a balm to my soul, and some healing to my heart.
Life is accepting life as it is everyday